Wednesday, July 16, 2008

When it rains it pours

Meet Lacey, she is my 19 year old sister. I just found out she is pregnant two days ago. Let me give you some info first. She had this boyfriend who was a complete loser. He was in and out of the juvenile detention hall mostly for drug related things, he dropped out of school as soon as he turned 18 in October of his senior year and is one of the dumbest people you'd ever meet. You could not hold a conversation with this kid and if you did manage, you walked away feeling a little dumber than you went into the conversation. My parents tried embracing him, being neutral and also flat out forbidding her to see him. Once she turned 18 there was nothing they could do, but lucky for my parents he moved to Connecticut with his uncle. Well as luck would have it, he came back and she was 18 so they started dating and were "in love." He cheated on her and they broke up. We heard for a few days about how everyone was right about him and she was sorry she didn't listen to us and that from now on she would because we were all seeing things she couldn't see. It seemed as though we had our sister/daughter/friend back. She was telling her one friend who is dating one of his best friends to learn from her and not get stuck with someone she thought she loved who really didn't love her because she didn't want to see her friend get hurt. That friend is due with a baby boy next month by the same loser boyfriend Lacey was trying to get her away from.

About a week or two after their break up they were friends again. We all knew this couldn't be good, but she was over 18 so my mom told her that he was under no circumstances allowed at her house. She was taking him there when no one was home and got busted. She took my mom's van to school a couple of weeks ago because her car wouldn't start. My mom told her she could go to school only, but of course she needed to see her "friend" so she totally went behind my mom's back and went to school and then left early and went to see her friend. My mom confronted her, blah, blah, blah and the rest is history. Every time you ask her she always says, "We are just friends. I don't like him like that anymore, but I want to be his friend that's how we started and I have always valued our friendship." Well blog readers apparently she thinks we were all born yesterday because she actually expected us to believe that story. Now she is pregnant by this loser.

I am not happy about it and I let her know. I told her she has no idea what she just did to her life and that getting pregnant was the stupidest, most selfish thing she could have done. Our ob/gyn told her about 2 years ago that if she was going to have a baby she should do it soon because she has some problems and her window for having a baby was small. Big, huge mistake on this "doctors" part if you ask me. Anyhow, I was talking to my older sister and she went off on me about how I shouldn't judge and I'm not perfect and I cheated on Mike the whole time I was pregnant with Taylor because her boyfriend now knows that I did. I did not in fact cheat on Mike. Anyways, I basically have written both of them off. I have too much to worry about with my headaches, my own kids and husband and frankly if she wants to sugar coat and support Lacey screwing up then so be it. I will not and refuse to talk to either one of them until I get my own health under control. If they want to speak nicely then I will, but I refuse to get into a screaming match just like I refused to yesterday. Then I was hung up on because although my sister is 30 she isn't exactly the height of maturity.

I am setting my blog to private, by the way so if you want to continue reading, give me your e-mail address and I will invite you. I will set it to private on Friday afternoon.

Have a happy Wednesday all! Pray for my parents during this time and really for everyone involved.


Suzie said...

I am so sorry you are having such a hard time. I can be reached at

Shana said...

Oh, this does sound like a mess! My prayers are with your family. (((HUGS)))

my wonderful men... said...

Wow! So sorry things are not going good in the family that's hard I know.

Please add me to your list.


Mimi's Toes said...

I'm sorry this turmoil is going on in your family. I will be in prayer for you and for God to give you strength to get you thru this as well as your parents and the innocent little baby. You can add me at

AZMom said...

Oh hon! I am so sorry you are having to deal with this after everything else you are going through.

Big hugs to you!

Laura said...

I was your sister almost 20 years ago, and I too learned that particular lesson the hard way. It's why I can tease and say that Nik is my sister. She was born when I was 19. A big mistake that turned into a blessing, in some ways. I grew up along side her, was able to meet my love and complete the circle with her adoption by him. Now, it's a bit bittersweet...but have hope that maybe, just maybe, this will be a kick in the pants for her. Thinking of you all... with lots of love.

Kathy said...

Catching up after being off-line for a bit. Hugs and prayers.

MandyPoo said...

Sorry to hear about your family's dispute, but remember, your younger sister is about to go through a really hard time and if she doesn't have any family to catch her when her (obviously insufficient) "man" leaves her again, then it will be ever worse for her. Just because you are nice to her doesn't mean that you agree with the decision that she made.

(Just a thought from someone who has been in a similar situation...)